After God removed Saul, He raised up David to be their king, testifying about him:
“I have found David, the son of Jesse, a man after My heart, who will do all My will.”
(Acts 13:22, NASB2020)
God is deeply concerned with matters of the heart.
Lately, Mandi and I have started asking each other a simple but searching question: “How’s your heart?” It’s a step beyond the usual, surface-level conversations—beyond “How’s your day?” or “What have you been up to?” It goes straight to what really matters.
We don’t ask it every day, but when we do, it’s hard to dodge. It invites honesty. It draws us out of hiding. Like many, we often try to guard or protect our hearts—whether from sin, disappointment, or even unspoken dreams and hopes. But God calls us to go deeper. He wants us to pursue not only His heart, but also the hearts of those He’s placed in our lives.
How do we stay tenderhearted in a hard-hearted world?
We pursue God’s heart. We love the Lord with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. We believe His Word and hold tightly to His promises with all our hearts. We worship Him in spirit and in truth, letting His presence soften us again and again. We repent of sin that so easily corrupts. We follow Jesus closely.
So, let me ask you: How’s your heart?
And just as important: How’s the heart of your marriage?
“God, see what is in my heart. Know what is there. Test me. Know what I’m thinking. See if there’s anything in my life you don’t like. Help me live in the way that is always right.”
(Psalm 139:23–24, NIRV)
Our hearts are sacred ground. They shape our words, our choices, and the atmosphere of our homes. When we slow down enough to ask each other, “How’s your heart?” we create space for honesty in the conversation. We open doors for healing, genuineness, and deeper connection—both with God and with those we do life with. Don’t let the busyness of life or the hardness of the world keep you from this simple, powerful question. Start asking it today and watch how God begins to do a deeper work in you and in your marriage.
James Barham is a counselor with ABCFM. He can be reached at James.barham@abcfm.org